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  • Writer's pictureJenny Lynn Keller

Wonky Sprouts


Just about everyone likes homegrown tomatoes and fresh corn. But I’m sorry to say cucumbers picked from the vine receive less affection. Mention cucumbers in a crowd of hungry folks, and opinions range from love to hate with few in between. If the haters tasted a small sweet cucumber from my garden the last few summers, perhaps their dislike would change. Not this year, even I don’t like them. I planted fresh seed from a new unopened package, added a little organic fertilizer, and waited for the tiny two-leaf sprouts. And waited . . . and waited . . . and finally three petite plants appeared. What happened next nearly broke my gardener’s green thumb. Call it a Jack-in-the-Beanstalk experience or Night-of-the-Cucumber Snatchers because my inch-long cucumbers morphed into T-ball bats overnight. If the cukes weren’t attached to the vines, I would’ve sworn someone stole my babies and replaced them with giants. Tasteless, all seeds, and tough skin giants. Yuck.


Was my cucumber disaster caused by too much rain, too little sun, early heat wave, or wrong seed in the package? Whatever the answer, the result is a bumper crop of tomatoes instead, so all is good. Live long enough, and you experience the same ups and downs in life. The story in Genesis of Joseph being sold into slavery by his brothers is a perfect example. When Joseph rises to Egypt’s second-in-command, he tells them in Genesis 50:20, “Don’t you see, you planned evil against me but God used those same plans for my good, as you see all around you right now—life for many people.” Joseph saved the nation from famine by storing up food for the lean years. No wonky cucumbers in his garden.


What’s your opinion of garden-fresh cucumbers? Love, hate, favorite way to eat them?

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